Best Quotes from the Iraqi War

[Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)]

This was passed to me today... I thought it rather good:

"Umm Qasr is a city similar to Southampton," UK defence minister Geoff Hoon said in The Commons yesterday.

"He's either never been to Southampton, or he's never been to Umm Qasr," says a British Squaddie patrolling Umm Qasr. He added: "There's no beer, no prostitutes, and people are shooting at us. It's more like Portsmouth."

[Dana Nield]

To: Jif
Re: Cleaning Expenses

10 Paper Towels
1 Bottle of Windex

For removal of Coke and snot from my monitor.

Re waiting for the body pick-up after the A-10 shoot 'em up.....


"Chemical warfare suits had to be worn because of the threat from the depleted uranium used in the American weapons."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/internatio...926167,00.html

[Tim Sullivan]

Alexander,

I'm all for open discussion of ALL viewpoints of the war, both pro and con, but what your post has to do with a light-hearted thread about the stupid things politicians say is beyond me.

If you want to make daily postings about why the war is bad why not start a thread perhaps? Don't go polluting light hearted and fun threads please.

Sorry about the comments Geoff, this just kinda ruined the thread for me....that's all... And nothing against you Alexander, this has nothing to do with your views or mine, just the appropriateness....

Tim

[Dana Nield]

Perhaps a personal Blog is in order.

Forgive me but I found it funny that the British are wearing their chemical suits to protect themselves against Americans and not Iraqis, especially since this war is supposed to be all about the potential of Iraqis using chemical/biological/nuclear weapons. Different senses of humour I guess.

If you notice, I have kept anything political in one thread.

[Tim Sullivan]

To get technical, they aren't using the chem suits to protect themselves against Americans, merely their munitions ;p....

Understood you saw humour in that story, it might have helped if you had made the comment right out that you thought it was funny. Of course, that you quoted your article from a known radical leftist anti-military, anti-gun website is another thing.... ;p

Tim

I rate all news sources as being suspect regardless of whether it is Pravda, Al Jazeera, National Post, or the Washington Times. They all have their own agenda that has nothing to do with the actual news.

[R Mark Davies]

Alexander,

I'm glad you can find humour in the recovery of a British soldier's body. I can assure you that I, as a British subject, would not be making flippant asides if it were a Canadian soldier lying dead in his vehicle.

And I'm glad that you can conveniently ignore the fact that ALL British servicemen in the region were, at the time, wearing NBC suits to protect themselves from the threat of Iraqi NBC attack, and not, as the Guardian (the most notorious left wing rag in this country, but they're entitled to their opinion) so slyly twisted the story for its own, anti-American agenda.

In this you clearly agree with me - they all have their own agenda and The Guardian has never made any secret of its agenda.

Mark

I'm glad you can find humour in the recovery of a British soldier's body.

---the humour was in the statement about the purpose of wearing the suit. Not the recovery of the body. The factof the the matter is that there have been quite a few unecessary deaths throughout this war, and it will only get worse from here.


I can assure you that I, as a British subject, would not be making flippant asides if it were a Canadian soldier lying dead in his vehicle.


----I wouldn't be offended if you had. Put it down to cultural differences. While I respect people from the UK, my ancestry in Canada dates back to the 1600s so I have no connection to Europe.

And I'm glad that you can conveniently ignore the fact that ALL British servicemen in the region were, at the time, wearing NBC suits to protect themselves from the threat of Iraqi NBC attack, and not, as the Guardian (the most notorious left wing rag in this country, but they're entitled to their opinion) so slyly twisted the story for its own, anti-American agenda.

---- duh! it was the quote I found funny, not the fact that the invaders have to protect themself against attacks. Keep in mind that there still is no evidence of any wmds in Iraq, and in fact, this invasion is no longer being touted as a warrantless search, but now it is touted as a "daisy-cutter liberation" - okay, I added the daisy cutter part



In this you clearly agree with me - they all have their own agenda and The Guardian has never made any secret of its agenda.

---the same could be said about Global in Canada - Izzy Asper has made that clear.

[Dana Nield]

I think I'll throw in my favourite in the area of "Best Quotes from the Iraqi War" since I think it is, at this point in time, quite relevant.

This has been attributed to Dennis Miller, and while it does sounds line a Miller rant, it was however, written by one W. Wayne Schields of Wichita Falls, Texas as a letter to the editor.


-----------------------------------------------


All the rhetoric on whether or not we should go to war against Iraq has got my insane little brain spinning like a roulette wheel. I enjoy reading opinions from both sides but I have detected a hint of confusion from some of you.

As I was reading the paper recently, I was reminded of the best advice someone ever gave me. He told me about the "KISS" method (Keep It Simple, Stupid!) So, with this as a theme, I'd like to apply this theory for those who don't quite get it. My hope is that we can simplify things a bit and recognize a few important facts.

Here are 10 things to consider when voicing an opinion on this important issue:

1) Out of President Bush and Saddam Hussein . . . Hussein is the bad guy.

2) If you have faith in the United Nations to do the right thing, keep this in mind, they have Libya heading the Committee on Human Rights and Iraq heading the Global Disarmament committee. Do your own math here.

3) If you use Google Search and type in "French Military Victories," your reply will be "Did you mean French Military Defeats?"

4) If your only anti-war slogan is "No War For Oil," sue your school district for allowing you to slip through the cracks and robbing you of the education you deserve.

5) Saddam and bin Laden will not seek United Nations approval before they try to kill us.

6) Despite common belief, Martin Sheen is not the President. He plays one on TV.

7) Even if you are anti-war, you are still an "infidel" and bin Laden wants you dead, too.

8) If you believe in a "vast right-wing conspiracy" but not in the danger Hussein poses, quit hanging out with the Dell computer Dude.

9) We are not trying to kill Iraqi citizens. We are trying to liberate them.

10) Whether you are for military action or against it, our young men and women overseas are fighting for us to defend our right to speak out. We all need to support them without reservation.

I hope this helps.

-------------------------------------------------

Now, if you don't agree with the above, that's fine. Hope you like to eat grass, as that might be all you'll have if the US continues to boycott Canadian companies. And those US Companies that are pissed with us are not pissed because we didn't join them in the LIBERATION of Iraq, but because of the name calling, booing of their anthem and burning of their flags.

Dana

Um, for the record, the US economy is really hurting now, whereas the Canadian economy is still doing relatively well. It will cause greater harm to the US to muck around with trade issues, and any company that allows these issues to affect their business dealings is not far from Chapter 11.

But alas...here's a pic I find funny.

[R Mark Davies]

Alexander,

What on earth does 1600 have to do with this? Where did I suggest that you had European ancestry and what would be the point?!

You suggest that we have cultural differences, but you are wrong. We have differences in attitudes, decency and good taste. In all the places I've travelled to in Canada and in all the people I've met, I've hardly encountered any difference in culture - very different to the USA, I might add. I think you're out of touch with your own culture.

Are you seriously suggesting that your countrymen would let you get away with your comments if it had been a trooper from the Royal Canadian Dragoons?

Mark

[QUOTE]Originally posted by R Mark Davies
[B]Alexander,

What on earth does 1600 have to do with this? Where did I suggest that you had European ancestry and what would be the point?!

-----just pointing out that I have no sentimental ties to England, unlike many English Canadians who do.

You suggest that we have cultural differences, but you are wrong. We have differences in attitudes, decency and good taste. In all the places I've travelled to in Canada and in all the people I've met, I've hardly encountered any difference in culture - very different to the USA, I might add. I think you're out of touch with your own culture.

-----Not only are there cultural differences between Canada and England, but certainly cultural differences between regions in Canada.


Are you seriously suggesting that your countrymen would let you get away with your comments if it had been a trooper from the Royal Canadian Dragoons?

---many would join in. When 4 PPCLIs were killed from friendly fire in Afghanistan, I was as upset about it as you appear to be. Did that stop me and my friends from making ironic coments about some of the things that were said about it? Lighten up already. Before this war even began we were joking that the British forces would have more to fear from the Americans than the Iraqis. This is the reality of war, since you support it so much, you have to accept the consequences of what you support. And once again, the joke was about the comment about the suits, not the fact that the soldier was killed. Way too many people are dying in this war, and please remind me, what's the reason this week? Not only have no WMDs been used, none have been found, and there is still no evidence to suggest that they exist.

[DaveCox]

The only thing the PBI on the ground WONT find funny is the death of a comrade - everything else is good for a laugh - it helps to keep'em going when the going gets tough.

As to why we're fighting - Iraq has (had?) three known El Queda training bases with the full knowledge and support of Saddam. This was never given out as the reason for going in but it's good enough for me.

As for friendly fire - it happens - according to a book I have over half the 7th Cavalry deaths at Wounded Knee are reputed to have been caused by crossfire between two sets of troopers and they've been at it ever since. My wife's cousin was with 4th Cdn. Armoured in Normandy and they were bombed twice by the 8th AF.

Just goes to show - the safest place to be when a yank has a gun is in front of him!

Originally posted by DaveCox

As to why we're fighting - Iraq has (had?) three known El Queda training bases with the full knowledge and support of Saddam. This was never given out as the reason for going in but it's good enough for me.

So far I've only hear of one camp near the Iranian border that was locacted in the Northern No-Fly zone, well beyong Hussein's reach. Please show me where you get this claim from.

[DaveCox]

The camps were shown on a map displayed on all UK television channels - one in the north and two to the north-east of Baghdad.

Announced today - British troops have found the bodies of more than a hundred people, mostly men in the remains of military uniform, many with broken bones, the majority shot in the head.

Originally posted by DaveCox
The camps were shown on a map displayed on all UK television channels - one in the north and two to the north-east of Baghdad.

And for the last year and a half I've been told that Osama Bin Laden is living beneath my bed. Some talking head pointing at a map is not proof. But in any case, if these were in fact what you claim, they were beyond the control of Hussein, and directly within the northern No-Fly zone and the US/British could have included them as targets in their daily bombings before the war started. More than likely they were hoping that the ground forces would find something to justify this war, but have not.

When a man doesn't want to do something he will find a thousand excuses, when he wants to do something he needs only one reason. In this case, there have been a thousand excuses to not to avoid war, but not a single reason to justify it.

Announced today - British troops have found the bodies of more than a hundred people, mostly men in the remains of military uniform, many with broken bones, the majority shot in the head.

And what hasn't been reported is who they are, how long they have been there, who put them there, etc. etc....News without context is not news at all, it is rumour.

[Dana Nield]

- And for the last year and a half I've been told that Osama Bin Laden is living beneath my bed.

He's actually under my bed, plotting against me with the dust bunnies.

-News without context is not news at all, it is rumour.

A proof is a proof, and, when you have a good proof, it’s proven.

-Some talking head pointing at a map is not proof.

Nor is someone mouthing off in a forum proof that it's not news.



Cheers!

Dana

And for the last year and a half I've been told that Osama Bin Laden is living beneath my bed.

He's actually under my bed, plotting against me with the dust bunnies.

-News without context is not news at all, it is rumour.

A proof is a proof, and, when you have a good proof, it’s proven.


------So, show me the proof.



-Some talking head pointing at a map is not proof.

Nor is someone mouthing off in a forum proof that it's not news.

-------no, you are absolutely right, but in pursuant to Canada's Constitution, and most other modern democracies (save the US under the Patriot Act) the onus is always on the accuser to provide the proof. But how did you, Dana, mix up proof and news? Your comments were illogical in their presentation.

[Dana Nield]

--Your comments were illogical in their presentation

They were not meant to be logical.

I guess I should not be feeding the Troll.

<ignore> DANA </ignore>



Not sure if this is an "acceptable" news publication, but this is for those who think that only the Canadian military doesn't get the equipment it needs...

Britons ask for flags to ward off US friendly fire

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article...634936,00.html

I just overheard the Reuters reporterss discussing the bodies that were found. Apparently they are victims of the Iran/Iraq war and are part of an exchange program for bodies. Or something associated with that. I'm sure next week the truth will come out, but one thing I have learned is that the "breaking news" seems to always change to the opposite of what was first reported.

[R Mark Davies]

Alexander,

Do not presume to lecture me about servicemen's humour.

I still fail to see what the hell you are implying with your 'cultural differences' speech. Are you suggesting that it is only Canadians with a misty-eyed devotion to the 'Mother Country' that support this war? Well actually the bulk of my friends in Canada are from the Ukrainian community in Winnipeg. They have been in Canada since about 1945 and the only Mother Country they have ties to is Ukraine.

However, they know what it's like to live under a vicious dictatorship...

Mark

PS Moscow that is - not Ottawa! :

Do not ever even think of lecturing me on Canadian culture. Particularly if "the bulk" of your friends are from one community. As for servicemen's humour, I have quite a few frineds in uniform, or that are vets, so don't tell me about servicemen. So go to hell.

[Dana Nield]

We'd never stoop to lecturing you, at least the way you lecture to us.

Cheers!
Dana

[Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)]

Clearly, one of the highlights of the sometimes ridiculous television coverage on this war, Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf seems to have talked his way into history! With his colourful and outlandish statements uttered in his daily press briefings, M.S.S. has earned the grudging admiration of millions.

There is now a website dedicated to the man and his remarkable legacy... be the first on your block to master his unforgettable rhetoric! Would you like a BBQ apron which announces that "God will roast their stomachs in hell!"? How about a t-shirt which states categorically, "My feelings - as usual - we will slaughter them all!"? All here and more, in all his magnificence...

Just hope the silly bugger survived to enjoy his fame! What a hoot...

http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/

[Keith Webb]

We'll all miss his pronouncements - this one is a favourite:

"We're going to drag the drunken junkie nose of Bush through Iraq's desert, him and his follower dog Blair...There are 26 million Saddams in Iraq"

He left out our own Prime Minister John Howard...

An excellent find, Jif!

[Matt]

I think this has to be one of his best!
"we have them blocked in,their rear is blocked"
Having a blocked rear eh? sounds painful!!

[Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2986459.stm

According to the BBC, he's alive and well in Baghdad... and even Bush likes him!