Some Funnies

[Alex Blair (RIP)]

Keith ..
Here is one for you...


Two traffic police officers on patrol near North Berwick were involved in an
unusual incident while checking for speeding motorists on the A1, Great
North Road.

One of the officers used a hand-held radar device to check the speed of a
vehicle approaching over the crest of a hill, and was surprised when the
speed was recorded at over 300 mph.

Their radar gun then suddenly stopped working, and the officers were not
able to reset it.

Just then a deafening roar over the tree-tops revealed that the radar had in
fact latched on to a NATO Tornado fighter jet which was engaged in a
low-flying exercise over the Scottish/English borders, approaching them from
the North Sea.

Back at police headquarters, the chief constable fired off a stiff compl
aint to the RAF Liaison office . . .

Back came the reply in true, laconic, RAF style:

"Thank you for your message, which allows us to complete the file on this
incident"

"You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Tornado jet
in question, had detected the presence of (and subsequently locked onto)
your hostile radar equipment, and had automatically sent a jamming signal
back to it, which was why it stopped working"

"Furthermore, an air-to-ground missile aboard the fully-armed aircraft, had
also 'automatically' locked onto your equipment"

"Fortunately the pilot flying the Tornado recognized the situation for what
it was, and quickly responded to the missile systems alert status, managing
to override the automated defense system, before the missile was launched
and your hostile radar installation was destroyed"

"Good Day"...................