[Ganmain Tony]

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlessinger said that, as an observant Orthodox
Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be
condoned under any circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr Laura, penned by a US resident,
which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
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Dear Dr Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as
many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for
example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an
abomination ... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's
Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female,
provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims
that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I
own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7.
In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period
of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have
tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim
the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly
states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or
should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't
agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination? Should I smite
him?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect
in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to
be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around
their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should
they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops
in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different
kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a
lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole
town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death
at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws?
(Lev.20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy
considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D.
Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction and Special
Education University of Virginia

P.S. It would be a damn shame if we can't own a Canadian